What Grinds My Gears: Short People Problems



Problems that one has to deal with simply due to being blessed with a shorter stature than others:

1.     People always pick you up. No, just because I’m short, it does not mean you have the right to forcibly lift me up in the air. No, I do not wish to be flung around just so you can chuckle about how “adorable” I am. Just because I happen to be smaller than you, does not give you permission to come into my personal bubble.

2.     Ditto to people using me as an armrest. It gets old.

3.     Not being able to reach stuff. It seems like a pretty obvious one: things that are on high shelves are hard to reach, like books at the library or groceries. Now, if it’s not annoying enough to have to look like an idiot attempting to grasp things a metre above you, it’s people asking why you don’t just get a stool or stand on something. Sometimes, even climbing on stuff doesn’t help us short folk: when my smoke alarm goes off at 1am in the morning, I can’t reach to turn it off, even when I stand on my bed. Sorry for all the noise, IH.

4.     Sleeves being too long. Pants being too long. Assorted clothing issues.

5.     Short jokes. I can appreciate a good one every now and again, as long as they’re witty. Problems only arise when I’ve heard the same one a bazillion times. Seriously, having people ask “how’s the weather down there?” is really, really annoying after the fiftieth time, especially as there’s not really any difference in temperature.

6.     Trying to sit on those exceedingly tall stools along counters. It’s like climbing Mount Everest attempting to sit on one of those things whilst trying not to look like a real idiot by stacking it. If that wasn’t enough, managing to balance when your feet can’t reach the rests as well as struggling to get down again just really makes the experience worthwhile.

7.     The inevitable “Wow, you’re so short!”
Thank you for telling me, because, you know: I hadn’t already noticed.

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