“If O-week is the badass nuclear bomb that explodes IH into smithereens, P-week is all about putting the pieces back together.”
Our purported aim, way back in November when I was assembling the squad, was to ‘mush the dirty horde of freshers with the rest of the student body’. Through our highly engineered program designed to destroy the individuality of the fresher bunch and subjugate them to our collective thought control, we broke a lot of ice and learnt how to say “sorry, what’s your name again?” in a non-awkward manner. Good job pals.
SUNDAY Toga party straddles the awkward line of O and P week, but due to its awesome vibe, the P Week squad are willing to take credit for it. IH was well lubricated that fine evening.
MONDAY We gave the student body a head start on gaining their fresher 5 by providing the winning team of our scavenger hunt with a whopping 3.3kg of goodies. We all saw some frightening things that night – weird makeup choices, inappropriate dancing and the consumption of way too much milk.
TUESDAY The P Week squad are so proud how IH got around futsal. We got hot and physical together and it brought us all closer emotionally.
WEDNESDAY We changed Red Frog history on Wednesday night by running the biggest Cafe Crawl they’d ever seen. Descending on Lygon like a swarm of gelati focused locusts, it was everything P Week should be: gentle companionship and fatty food. Also some people went to the pub.
THURSDAY Commencement Dinner isn’t under our jurisdiction, but it was truly a brilliant night. Whether in our own dining hall, at Union House or at the Queensbury, we really “brought it” in the classiest sense of the phrase.
FRIDAY Speaking of bringing it, you all brought your own mugs and your funky fresh dance moves to the JCR that evening. We all aimed for more of a fresher 15 as we devoured the Tim Tams like a plague of TimTam focused locusts.
SATURDAY Although we cheekily dubbed the event “Hunting Season”, we need to take this opportunity to disclaim that P Weekers do not encourage the hunting of our local zoo animals. Any harm that befell animals or freshers during this event was purely accidental. SUNDAY Peter proposed a picnic in the park with a panda.” Perfect!” I pronounced. “I’m partial to picnics. Perhaps we could play polo, peruse some publications or partake in the pickings present with pals.”.